The Afterlife of Billy Fingers: How My Bad-Boy Brother Proved to Me There's Life After Death by Kagan Annie

Author:Kagan, Annie [Kagan, Annie]
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3
ISBN: 9781612833064
Publisher: Hampton Roads Publishing
Published: 2013-03-01T00:00:00+00:00

SEVENTEEN

Quantum

When I woke up the next morning, I studied the ceiling for even a hint of blue light, but there was none. Not that morning, or the next, or the one after that. In an effort to coax a visit from Billy, I started sitting at my computer just after dawn, looking out my glass doors and up at the sky.

A little more than a week later, Billy appeared in the sky again, this time doing an impersonation of a bad-boy angel. A sparkly toy halo, like one you'd buy at a party store, sat crooked on his head; he had an exaggerated saintly expression on his face. Every once in a while he'd look at the red notebook in his hands and make faces as if he were reading the most interesting, surprising words ever written. This was exactly the way Billy would fool around when he was alive. Even though what I was seeing made me question my sanity, I was glad he was there.

For the next few days, when I was outside, Billy the bad-boy angel would often pop up. I'd be walking in town, talking to an acquaintance, putting gas in my car—and there he'd be, hamming it up in the sky. He appeared when other people were around, but I was the only one who could see him. It was our secret.

After three or four days of this, when I woke up and saw Billy's light above my bed, I went straight to my computer and tuned in.

I know one of the reasons you're hesitant to share these writings is because you want to protect our relationship from ridicule, and I thank you for that. But darling, there isn't anything to protect really, is there? All we're doing is telling the story. Let it be up to each individual to take it or leave it. Some people will believe it's true. Others will say “perhaps,” but “perhaps” is a big improvement over “no way.”

Everyone on earth is eternal, but they don't know it. They may sort of believe it, but they don't know it. That's because it's too much to know. Eternity is not a concept the mind can grasp. You can try to imagine it, but then, not being able to experience it, your mind says, “Yeah, I think it's a terrific story, maybe true,” but ultimately it rejects what it cannot understand. That's because it isn't your mind that can grasp all of this. It's something much bigger and more real than your mind.

Let's take you, for example. Even though you're the one having these experiences, you still don't completely accept the whole thing, do you? Why? Because your earthliness is rising up against the reality of me talking to you from a different sphere. Darling, this is more than a book. I want to help you and others expand your consciousness. Make a quantum leap.

What do I mean by that? Well, let me give you Billy's version of quantum—quantum in a few easy steps.

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